12 March 2010

The Upper-lip Stain

This is dedicated to Perry Ruiz: a really classy guy.

Over the years, we have been plagued by what common society calls "the moustache".

What causes this phenomenon, and what would possess someone to choose this lifestyle?

Men (and the occasional hairy-faced woman) are under the false impression that they look appealing and/or attractive.

The problem could be caused, and certainly escalated by a personal lack of razors, or other trimming equipment. In younger adults, the appearance of a moustache (it's worst form, in my opinion) is a young man's bragging right. "Hey, I'm going through puberty, check out the 'stache!"

There are many different types of these horrendous anomalies. Let's take a little tour, shall we?

The Hungarian:

The Toothbrush: (aka: the Hitler 'stache)

The Handlebar:

The Fu Manchu:

Note-worthy people with a Fu Manchu? Anton LaVey, founder of the Church of Satan. Exactly.

Other styles include the "Walrus", the "Chevron", and the "Pencil, which I can't even bring myself to include a picture of, due to my gag-reflex.
If you have a moustache, you are automatically a creeper. Sorry, that's just how it goes.

Conclusion is this: if you are not one of these two men, you should say "NO" to the moustache.



  1. My papa does pull off the stache....I dont know any one else who can without a full beard to go along with. GO P-dog Ruiz!

  2. Everyone knows I think his stache is epic!

    I love you.